If only I could hand out merit badges for eating my food...

To know me is to know my flaws.  A) I can't cut hair.  Just ask my bangs.  B) I couldn't cook my way out of a crock pot.  Even Oodles of Noodles turns into a culinary ropes course, a course where my laces are tied and my eyes are covered.  C) I will run out of letters during this self-deprecating exercise if I am honest.  

So Jesse already knows that I stink worse than garlic when positioned behind a spatula.  Miles, as my loving and devoted son, has tried to keep his taste buds open.  However, we've reached then end of the road...

"You want me to eat what!?!"
"Okay, mommy.  For you, I'll try anything."

"That meal is a deal breaker.  Get me outta here!"