Jesse's is the final karyotype we need. Miles and I have had our done. As I've posted earlier, my test came back negative as a carrier, which is great. Chances of Jesse being a carrier are slim, but there is still a risk. He's having the test done at my all-female Ob-Gyn practice. My doctor recommended Jesse have his blood drawn there because they are equipped to handle the procedure. Most walk-in labs cannot do this test. Why the difficulty finding a willing location- I have no clue. To me, it looks like a simple blood test. Granted, the actual processing is quite complicated, but it is not completed on-site. Samples are shipped to a lab in California.
Thursday is Miles' day at the doctor. This will be his first post-op visit with his regular cardiologist. Truthfully, I am nervous. His final echocardiogram revealed a tiny leak around the patch. Not necessarily a bad development, he is likely to seal the gap on his own. Furthermore, the surgeon had to exercise caution putting stitches in near his natural pacemaker. An errant stitch could ruin that electrical impulse and require the implantation of an artificial pacemaker for life. So a tiny leak is not a big deal at all. I know this; I'm just afraid that something new will be found, or the doctor will discover the leak has gotten larger. We've never had an appointment with a happy ending with this doctor- always bad news. If I sound a little paranoid, it's because I am- just a tad. These are just those nasty thoughts that linger behind my daily thoughts and activities. Come Thursday morning, these fears will be on the front page of my face. But until then, I can keep them (and myself) in check.
2 comments:
Perhaps news is never good or bad. Perhaps it just is. If news needs to be judged as to its value, maybe "helpful" and "not helpful" are more suitable labels. Then again, maybe we just need to wait for the outcome or other developments in order to see the news' value, if any, in a clearer light. Of course, it's easier to write this than to do it.
K
I wish I could shut off the judgmental part of my brain, but I've been an ENFJ since high school. You have to admit, I've gotten a bit more relaxed over the years, just a bit. Oddly enough, I retook that test last week- same results, though lower on the "E" scale.
If I am not mistaken, we share that "J" personality type. I don't think there is anything inherently wrong in searching for an emotional value in an event; that is simply how I process and internalize the world. Furthermore, I am so sensitive to other people's emotions and energy. It is near impossible to avoid being affected, but that is a skill I have been working on for a long time. (And you know that.)
I agree, wait for the actual news before forming an opinion. But what about now- now is a time that counts. And waiting has been the most painful part of these past few months: waiting for initial test results, waiting for the surgery to happen, waiting while the surgery is being done, waiting for Mies to recover. . .you name it; I've waited through it. And as I have waited, my emotions rode shotgun.
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