Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Moment of Zen

Last night, after writing my post, I realized just how bummed I've been lately. I've been suppressing a lot of my anxieties, fear, and anger. As we all know, shoving those negative feelings down inside never accomplishes any good. Writing last night was so cathartic. As I left the computer and joined my husband and son in the living room, I still had the tear track marks fresh on my face. But sitting with my two favorite people, telling Jesse exactly what I've been going through, and watching Miles and his Daddy play began my healing process. However, my true moment of Zen occurred later that night. As I was putting Miles in his bed, he let out a real laugh. Not some weak babyish coo, but a real belly laugh! It actually startled me because he was asleep. I decided to sit back down with him and watch him for a few more minutes. Sure enough, not two minutes later he cracked a devilish smile and let loose with a wild laugh. Craziest and most special moment to date- it was like he knew I needed that laugh. It made my day and night- heck, it has made my month. His slumbering laughter is a riot- so loud and strong, like someone just whispered to him a dirty joke. This is not some timid, childish chuckle- this is a barroom gut giggle, a laugh that makes other people laugh. I can't wait for the rest of the world to hear it! It's true what they say about the healing power of laughter. . .I feel a billion percent better!

3 comments:

Kit said...

An angel had just told Miles how much love he'll bring to the world!

Unknown said...

I love that boy!

Cynthia said...

Ben's first giggle got me that way too, while we were waiting for surgery. He was sleeping. He did a lot of stuff in his sleep first, even crawling. Made me think he wanted to do things so badly he dreamed about them, and in his dreams, he could!