Milestones

Missing In Action

2011-12-12T17:47:00.001-06:00

Wow. Raising two young children and maintaining a blog is apparently impossible. Okay, I am not technically supposed to be here right now- in reality, I am sitting in class. Also in reality, my mind is a billion light years away. Why the disconnect you ask? I'm exhausted. Poptart is still teething. I am finishing out another grad class. The house is still in the process of being fixed. Miles is a wild man. And on, and on, and on. Blah, blah, blah.

Anyhoo. Onto the big news. Poppy is turning one in about two weeks. Hubba what! Where did this major milestone come from? Who left life on fast-forward? My baby girl is rocketing toward toddler-hood, and this fact is blowing my mind. You should see her- trying to walk around, being a big girl, getting angry when she doesn't get her way. She's a spark plug and a firework rolled into one; she's the apple of both of my eyes, and then some. She's also Miles' biggest fan- even when he's trying to tip her over.

Okay, here are a few of my favorite pics that I've not yet shared:

The Munchkins hanging with Uncle Dude in October

My Kimpton Kiddos

Yum.

What 'cho lookin' at?

Miles is currently obsessed with his Dede's fashion sense. He's loving his collared shirts and making ties out of ripped up coloring books. He either needs an intervention or a gift card to Land's End.

I plan on coming up for air soon, posting more pictures of my little critters, and (hopefully) having some much needed relaxation and fun!

You knows it's going to be a long day...

2011-10-30T10:05:00.001-05:00

You've got the kids on a 10:30 am nap drive. Here's wishing my two papers will magically write themselves tonight. Come on Great Pumpkin, you owe me one.

Homeward Bound

2011-10-23T16:09:00.001-05:00

Riding shotgun in some poopy traffic- it's been slow going on our return from DC. A blissful getaway, the kids were true travel champs. As I mentioned before, yesterday was one for the record books. Today was a close second.

More family time, beautiful weather, and time spent exploring parts of a truly great city... A perfect ending to a splendid weekend. The munchkins have been passed out for hours now (remember this drive is taking way too long), and I'm quietly praying this sleep won't affect our bedtime routines tonight- especially since I will be flying solo. Looks like Jesse will be capping the weekend off with a work-call. And I've been silly and reading all the while the critters have been snoozing. Will I ever learn?

Oh, hello interstate 64. So nice to see you again. Wake the kiddies now or coast in quiet??? Whatever we do, we will have some great lasting memories. Mom & Dad, thanks for making this trip possible.

Little Man, Big City

2011-10-22T19:50:00.001-05:00

We are DC tonight. Earlier today we cheered on Team Miles for Miles at the Best Buddies event. I couldn't think of a better, more fitting way to honor Disability Awareness Month.

Many more pictures to come; this day will be remembered as a favorite for many years to come.

One From the Road

2011-10-21T11:43:00.001-05:00

Blogging for DS- my 31 for 21

2011-10-18T20:31:00.001-05:00

Another year is slinking by, and I forgot to do the 31 for 21 campaign. I love that DS blogging parents remember this and share their stories. I'm so wrapped up with maintaining our ground troops that I forgot to type while in the trenches.

So I'm going to make a list of 31 ways Down syndrome has impacted my life. This will be my 31 for 21; Lord knows when I will resurface again. Here goes...

1. Celebrate daily. For example, last week was the first time Miles specifically asked for "mommy hugs." I've waited 3.5 years to hear that; you better believe that was celebrated here.

2. Miles will always be a person first- there should be no label before his name. Ever.

3. Fight for what you believe in.

4. Let go of those things you cannot change- or just telling yourself that until you forget it all together.

5. Start early. Education begins at birth. (I read Miles a Kurt Vonnegut book in its entirety on his second day alive... Explains a lot, I think.)

6. Sign language is amazing. Sign language unlocks doors and opens minds.

7. Music is universal- just ask our tiny Smokey Robinson fan.

8. Lead with your heart, hope with your head, and hold hands when the going gets tough. Thank God for Team Milestones!

9. Believe in the power of praise. All kids like positive feedback.

10. When the going gets rough, tag team it. Know when to tap out and collect yourself.

11. Laughter will see you through. Same for coffee. Add in Thomas the Tank Engine toys.

12. Flashcards!!!!

13. Every moment is a teachable moment- from the grocery store to the doctor's office.

14. My son is braver than I am at times. Scratch that- mist of the time.

15. Breathing should never be underrated.

16. Playing together, having fun, and laughing is the best way to bond- kids know when you genuinely enjoy your time together.

17. OTs, PTs, and speech therapists hung the moon.

18. Heart surgeons and PICU staffers are my heroes.

19. Doctors, in general, don't like me. However, nurses love my son.

20. Know your rights.

21. Know how to ask for help.

22. Know that it is not your fault.

23. Know that you have to be honest with yourself, acknowledge your feelings, and be willing to share them.

24. Foster independence.

25. Socialize and Enrich- just like rinse and repeat... Should be done daily.

26. Hug it out- know that you and your partner will be facing some pretty big challenges.

27. Do your research.

28. Brag whenever possible because good news is always worth sharing.

29. Don't be afraid to speak up or speak out.

30. "Life is full of surprises" is truer than I first believed.

31. Down syndrome is only a tiny fraction of my son's life. DS doesn't define him. DS doesn't restrict our family. It is merely the spring board for the greatest period of growth and learning in my life, and it is simply the starting point of my son's amazing life adventure. "It is not a problem. It's an opportunity," once said a wise granddad.

Well it happened...

2011-10-11T18:09:00.001-05:00

I've become one of "those" parents, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

9 Months of Awesomeness

2011-10-11T18:00:00.001-05:00

A Night for Writing

2011-10-04T21:33:00.000-05:00

So I just penned "Miles's Story" to help support CDR. I'll posting it below. We are hoping it gets added to their website; this is an organization very near and dear to our hearts. Read it and let me know what you think:

Miles’s Story

Fromthe moment he arrived, Miles has been a constant life force, a source ofinspiration, and giver of true love in our family. He spent the first two months of his life in the quietcomfort of status quo. Fromdelivery through several doctor’s appointments, Miles was the picture ofhealth. He was never fussy, alwaysready for snuggles, and was responding positively to our presence; basically,the arrival of our first child was typical and predictable. All except for a slight snag, Miles hadnot developed a “social smile” by his two-month check-up. It was at this time our pediatricianfirst mentioned the possible need for genetic testing, as a precautionarymeasure. I remember leaving thatappointment literally shaking; my world, my precious son, may not be as healthyas we first imagined. Followingthe lab procedure, our family spent a breathless weekend anxiously awaiting theresults. During this time, myfirst Mother’s Day passed. Whilewe all put on brave faces to celebrate the special occasion, my heart wasbreaking inside as our son’s fate waited to be revealed.

Bythe time we learned of Miles’s condition, a translocation form of Downsyndrome, we had prepared ourselves for the news. Oddly enough, hearing the news was such a drastic relief forus. We could now breath, collectourselves, and seek out the best possible resources for our beautiful son. Within the week of learning aboutMiles’s condition, I had contacted Child Development Resources. Their response was immediate, as wastheir compassion for my family.

Tobe honest, the period of initial evaluation and IFSP development is a bit of ablur. Not only were we coping withMiles’s recent diagnosis, we also learned very quickly that he had a profoundcongenital heart defect. He wasquickly scheduled for open-heart by-pass surgery. Prior to that procedure, we were able to have a few sessionswith Robin, Miles’s case manager and OT from CDR. We used that time to discusswhat post-op accommodations would be needed, and, more importantly, we began tobuild the foundation for a wonderful partnership.

Milessailed through the surgery like a true champion; he was much stronger andbraver than the rest of us. Followinga few weeks of recovery, Miles resumed his work with Robin. She was both an excellent therapist andan instructor, showing us how to best encourage Miles’s development and toreinforce her efforts. In Miles,Robin saw and fostered his awaiting potential. Over the next year, Wilda joined our team as Miles’s speechtherapist. Her patience andpersistence was evident from day one. Robin and Wilda will always be very important people in Miles’s life;their dedication and support are the driving force behind Miles’s currentsuccesses.

Inaddition to receiving direct services, Miles also attended a weekly CDRplaygroup. From hiding out in theball pit to racing around the playground on splash days, Miles had many greatfriends (children and staff alike) during those visits. We also made some great friends,too. Watching him explore anddevelop in a truly supportive and nurturing environment was a gift for us. Furthermore, CDR did an amazing jobproviding transitional supports for our family as Miles made the move fromin-home services to attending a special education program in the public schoolsetting. While the transitionworkshop for parents was very helpful, watching Miles ride the CDR bus inpreparation for the public school bus was the highlight of that time. To this day, Miles’s favorite part ofhis school day is riding the bus, a fact we solely attribute to CDR.

Timeseems to be racing by now. Mileshas just entered his second year in the public school setting. Not only is he getting bigger by theday, he is now a big brother. His vocabulary is exploding, justas his command of his environment. And rest assured dear friends at CDR, he is still blowing kisses.

Asidefrom all of the support Miles received, I will always be indebted to thepersonal care that came my way. Prior to Miles’s birth, I began my work as a special education teacherfor the county. All of my classesand training had only prepared me to be a teacher, not a parent. Robin, Wilda, and countless of otherCDR staffers helped me make the leap from professional to parent byentertaining my thousands of questions and providing gentle and continualencouragement. Your support hashelped me become the parent I am today. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

Riding for Miles (Miles for Miles)

2011-09-13T19:05:00.002-05:00

Two of our favorite people, Clark (Uncle Dude) and Katie, are riding in the Best Buddies Ride in Washington, D.C. in Miles's honor. If you love Miles, want to support the Best Buddies program, or simply have a burning desire to spend money, please visit their fundraising website. Click here!

Please support Team Miles for Miles

In the dark

2011-08-30T08:46:00.001-05:00

We are in the dark, going on day 3 1/2 without power. The house survived the storm with only minor damages, though we lost some huge limbs. As for us, we are doing okay. Irene greatly rattled Poppy, and she's been fussy since. We also think she's afraid of the dark, poor baby. Miles is loving all of the sticks and puddles- it's like little man adventure land. And Jesse and I have been locked in a serious ongoing Scrabble battle. I won last night with a 54 point word which u cannot share in this family forum- : ). All in all, we are feeling thankful, especially as we remember Hurticane Katrina this time of year.

It's the final countdown.

2011-08-23T10:49:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow this time I will be setting up classroom. Sigh.

Tonight

2011-08-19T19:33:00.001-05:00

Tonight I am grieving for some friends of our family.

Until now I thought a sudden death would be a blessing, no long drawn out illness, no time spent fearing all of the unknowns... Now I am feeling the pain of an unexpected passing, the pain of not getting to say goodbye. And that is truly devastating.

Back to School Thoughts while Going Blonder

2011-08-19T13:55:00.001-05:00

Sitting here, head full of foils, counting down the seconds until I start my 6 year as a teacher. How 'bout them apples? That's amazing! This is also a landmark victory because I've made it past the typical 5 year burnout for special educators. Like I tell folks, I'm in special education life- in one capacity or another. Which brings me to another thought- if I weren't teaching, how else could I be as involved in the special education community in a professional sense? Teaching keeps me on the front line for all procedural and paperwork changes; it allows me to be our best advocate. I've always thought things happen for a reason, and my background definitely has definitely payed off in spades on terms of knowing and finding resources for Miles. So I guess I owe a huge AMEN and thanks for my school district for taking in me.

And I'm not the only one in countdown mode. Miles wanted to talk about his bus last night at bedtime. He's so ready. He misses his buddies, all of the fun activities, and of course, his beloved bus. I would pay (if I could) to get the same driver and aide for him. Miss Rita & Miss Carolyn truly loved him- and we couldn't have felt better sending him off each day- besides, they gave him the best hugs. I'm going to tear up soon- time to blame the bleach.

Updates: M & P

2011-08-16T21:49:00.002-05:00

Miles is rebounding from two nasty infections. We had a double-header of strep and sinus infections come crashing down on him (and me) last week. After two rounds of two different meds, he's looking better. Still a bit snotty, but his energy and ability to cooperate (which disappears when he's sick) have returned.

Poppy has teeth, two beautiful (and Ginsu sharp) bottom teeth. The top two are begging to join the party, and they are hellbent on making an entrance as soon as possible. For the most part, Penelope is handling the matter with elegance and grace. Other times, she is gnawing my hand off in a non-verbal plea for some liquid Tylenol. God bless teething toys. Especially those that can be chilled. Amen.

Open

2011-08-16T21:42:00.004-05:00

I'm officially open for suggestions. Like... go back to school and finish my needed course work in art (or philosophy, psychology, Am. studies... all the cool places my brain visited before joining the real world.) These past 24 hours have me thinking a change is needed. So, I am going to open-minded and see what the universe (and your thoughts) might be. Is it time to pick up the paint brush again? Write a novel? Explore the cultural influence of John Hughes films on shaping Generation X's approach to consumerism and identity in an ever-narrowing capitalistic market tinged with monopolistic rhetoric? Seriously, I need to stretch my proverbial "career" legs and take a look around. Maybe.

An analogy waiting to happen...

2011-08-15T14:44:00.000-05:00

Red Leaves

2011-08-15T14:27:00.002-05:00

The Japanese maple on my deck has recently sprouted red leafs. Much bigger than the existing green leaves. Fast and furious, they have crashed my little tree's house party, and they are looking to take over. Is there an analogy lurking in here? Something to do with the green and red leaves developing differently though they are from the same tree, that they will have to work together as they age- giving nutrients to the tree for a common good, as siblings they will be supporting each other, and... Naw, I was just checking to make sure you were paying attention.

But seriously, the maple is starting to turn red... and we are in the last, wheezing, gasping moments of my beloved summer vacation, or as this year will forever be known as, Toddler 'n' Teether 2011! Going back to work might actually be a bit easier than what I've had to juggle over the past few hot weeks. Middle schoolers vs. Thomas tiny tots... it's a toss up.

Is my heart breaking at the thought of not spending 90% of my days with Miles and Poppy? You bet your sweet bippy it is. Breaking into a million tiny pieces- oddly shaped like toy trains and binkies. Most of the time, my timing stinks. But Poppy's is spot on. She waited until June to truly come out of her shell, and I'd like to think she was saving it up for me. Thank God for this time because I've been able to bond with her. And we've been able to watch Miles fall in love with his sister, too. Case in point, I trucked the munchkins into school today- had to pick up my new laptop. The drive over couldn't have been cuter; they were taking turns making each other laugh. Think ridiculously cute and multiply that by 100, that's what it was like to be there.

As I am going to miss them once I'm back full time in the classroom, I know they will miss each other when Miles also returns to school. This might make me a bit sadder than as I before. Great. Back to those red leaves, I guess.

Achoo!

2011-08-08T08:04:00.001-05:00

On today's agenda- cleaning and sneezing. Poppy's big move is underway, and I've already had my first dose of allergy medication. As has Miles- he woke up crusty and cranky. I don't think his OTC allergy meds are cutting it anymore. He and both suffer from arm bumps related to allergies. While mine are under control, his have erupted this summer. Little man now has to use a prescription lotion containing lactic acid- as thus far it's not helped. Our ENT is also an allergy wizard. Hopefully we will make to our October appointment without having to move it up.

Photographic Evidence: They're Growing Like Weeds

2011-08-07T21:40:00.004-05:00

My Dear Sweet Neglected Blog

2011-08-07T21:14:00.003-05:00

I really should write more. Yes, I say this, but I also believe it. However, will I commit to fulfill this need tonight? Probably not. It's late. I've got to get to bed. Blah. blah, blah.

Why do I need to write? Well, there's simply a lot brewing these days. Events, concerns, questions, and (frankly) venting that would best be served in this forum. Annnnnd more importantly, I need to do more bragging. Bragging and sharing more pics of my amazing kids.

Back to the grumpies I am facing. After all is said and done, I think I am struggling with issues rooted in fear. Fears related to the future- our family, our country, our world. Aren't we all? There's a lot to fret about, and I am a natural born fretter. Writing on this blog has always helped me cope during the hard times, the darkest of days, and all points in between. I used this blog to navigate Miles's diagnosis and his heart surgery, and I should revisit this form of "therapy" to relate the wild ride that is toddlerhood, persuing a master's degree with two small children, working full-time, and not having slept a full night in well-over a year. And like I mentioned earlier, as to not be the pessimist I could be, I have much to share and celebrate.

Without further ado, allow me to relay some warm fuzzies. Starting with the little man... We had an amazing visit at the Kennedy Krieger Institute. Loved Baltimore, love the center. Though we didn't really learn anything drastically new, we were able to rule out Autism for Miles. There had been an increasing of stemming-like behaviors this year. Following OT and medical evaluations, kiddo doesn't appear to be on the spectrum at this time. KKI has also made available behavioral support if we feel its warranted at a later time. Good to know. And we'd gladly make the trek north for their support as opposed to going back to CHKD, seriously.

Now onto the Poptart... Penelope, whom is mostly referred to as Poppy and/or Poptart these days, is a bustling and bubbly 7 month old ball of wonder and delight. Each day I fall more in love with her; her level of interaction and affection grow by the hour. Her personality is steadily emerging, and her interactions with Miles only encourage it to blossom. Tomorrow, she will be officially moving out of our room and into her own room, next door to Miles. Sigh. They will be neighbors now. And Liloo will have to work double-time to keep my lonely feet warm. As soon as she is moved in, I will post pictures.

Well, maybe I did write a bit more than planned. I feels good to be back, and here's hoping I return sooner than later. I do have a bit more time with summer classes done for now. I've said it before, and I'll say it again- find me on Facebook. Love ya!

Baltimore- We loved you!

2011-07-01T20:55:00.003-05:00

So many more on facebook. You should be my friend on there! Hint, hint...

We were in Baltimore to visit the Kennedy Krieger Institute. Miles met with the doc in the Down Syndrome Clinic one day, and had an OT evaluation on another day. In short, it was an amazing and hugely affirming visit. Especially the OT portion- those fluent in your edu-speak can appreciate that I was able to talk shop with all parties there, which the OT found "refreshing." This is very different from the hostile vibes I got from several medical providers at CHKD. To know me is to know that I know my stuff- researching is like breathing air, and I always come prepared. And the KKI is the place for parents like me! Regardless, the appointments went amazing well. Kiddo even cooperated well-enough to take some standardized assessments.

When we were at the KKI, we were having a blast at in Inner Harbor. Luckily, our hotel was on the edge of Little Italy. Needless to say, we ate very well. Above are a few snaps from the journey, and seriously, look me up on fb. I post more on there these days. I will gladly accept a friend request from a Milestone's reader.

PS- Poppy is now 6 months old. What?!?!?!?!?!? She's rocketing into 9/12 mo. sized clothing like it's her job. Maybe she just wants a new look. I completely understand. : )

Another Milestone: End of Miles's First Year of Pre-K

2011-06-16T19:44:00.004-05:00

Thank you to all of Miles's teachers, school staff, and service providers for an absolutely amazing year. Our little man has grown leaps and bounds, and your guidance and instruction lead the way. He adores school, loves his bus driver and aide, and has made new friends. So many new skills have emerged, his vocabulary and speech are blossoming daily, and we can't wait to see what the future holds! Have a wonder summer NEED Center! You are all the best!

Photos below are from an end-of-year cookout and presentation his class held. Obviously, I can't post the pics of Miles and his pals- but know that he had a great time running around with his them. We, the Miles fan club, had an excellent time taking in the show. I am so happy we all had a chance to come in and visit.

Double Header: Miles & Poppy get baptized!

2011-06-16T19:02:00.004-05:00

Last weekend, both Miles and Penelope were baptized. The world now has two new tiny Presbyterians toddling about. The grandparents, our favorite uncle, and some very dear friends joined us. Pretty close to our wedding party! The ceremony was at Weston Manor, and my hometown congregation welcomed my little ones with open arms and hearts. We love you First Presby! Thank you for your support and compassion over the years.

The grandparents: Grandpa, Mawmaw, Dede, and Mimi

Jesse, Poppy, Uncle Dude, and Miles

Me & the Munchkin

MK, Poppy, and Jennifer

The Fam awaiting the ceremony

Update from Cute-topolis

2011-05-29T15:14:00.001-05:00

This about sums it up.

2011-05-29T07:50:00.002-05:00

Spread the Word to End the Word.

Show your support here!

Forcing the matter

2011-05-29T07:32:00.003-05:00

And the matter at hand is Miles's transition to a "big boy" bed. As of 7 am today, a crib is no longer an option. It's as if a monolith appeared in his room, and his bed linens became instant tools. (Quick note: I initially spelled linens as "lenins." Yikes, I must become more domestic and less intelligentsia, STAT.)

Upon inspection, the pillow and comforter had been turned into a make-shift launch pad, and I am assuming his string bean legs worked as the rocket boosters. Sadly, the landing strip was his face. Nothing like seeing your little man greet you at the door, teary eyed and with an instant shiner. As breakfast wears on, that shiner has grown bigger and more menacing looking. He's looking less toddlery and more thuggish.

What to do? We've got a real bed in the wings for him- an awesome hand-me-down trundle bed- but I am not ready for that jump- literally and figuratively. Luckily, his IKEA crib is convertible. So off one side will go today, and up a set of bumpers. That's the easy part. The trickier part will be figuring out what will have to be removed my the room. I'm thinking his full size drum kit may need to visit a different room- the same goes for the guitar, paints, markers, and on, and on, and on. Wish us luck!

Happy Birthday Daddy

2011-05-22T19:10:00.001-05:00

We love you more than all of the ice cream cake in the world! Jesse, you are the kindest and most patient father ever. Your compassion and pride radiates through your smile and eyes. The love you have for your children is known by all who talk you for more than a minute. And they love you back equally, if not doubly. For you are Daddy, bringer of all things cool and neat, giver of great hugs and boo-boo kisses, and protector on all outings and adventures. You are our rock, our glue, our tester of new fish stick brands. You are the best, and we wish you the happiest of birthdays.

Little Lady

2011-05-21T11:38:00.001-05:00

Yesterday I ordered Poppy's first engraved silver bracelet. Name and birthday on the underside. Figured she needs a little flash and formality for her upcoming baptism. And I say first because she is my daughter, and I luuuuuuv a good piece of engraved/ monogrammed sterling. Luuuuuuuv. Now rumor has it that a local thrift store has a bulk supply of Lily Pulitzer baby dresses. Just have to snag a few and my vision is complete!

High Flying with Mommy

2011-05-17T20:01:00.001-05:00

She's magical, but you already knew that.

2011-05-17T20:00:00.001-05:00

Sharing is...

2011-05-17T19:17:00.001-05:00

...caring? Well, this is not the case when you a gifting upper respiratory infections to your near and dear. We've been teaching Miles how to cough onto his sleeve, but he's better at spraying it about the room. Penelope was the first to snag it- she's a coughing machine. Jesse is now showing early symptoms. Great, so my coffee sharing hubs kept the germ love Fest alive and sent the microbe party my way.

In totally unrelated news, I've been accepted into ODU's M.S. Ed. program. Glad to see my 48 grad transfer hours have found a home. Allow me to be your cautionary tale on program hopping. Live and learn, just preferably in a program.

Picture Updates

2011-05-16T19:47:00.001-05:00

Why

2011-05-16T19:43:00.001-05:00

Why do little ones fight going to sleep? Tooth and nail on this house. Why, I'd fight for the right to just take a tiny nap for myself at this point. Penelope is trying to go 10 rounds with me, her snuggle bunny soothing swing, her beloved ladybug blankie, and an array of tasty and calming binkies. What she doesn't know is that I will ultimately win. (Duh, moms are winners!) I hold the power of the nap drive. We are only a key ring away to silence; well, given current gas prices, 30 minutes of silence. Subaru trumps baby grumpies, or at least it will if she doesn't cool her tiny jets within the next 15 minutes.

Miles should crash on his own tonight. He finally went back to school today; the bronchitis is on the retreat, I pray. He played his little buns off earlier though he's still not at 100%- so I'm hoping that translates into an easy, early night. However, knowing how spirited my children prefer to be, he's probably gearing up to streak the house and whiz on a house plant for fun.

A mini-post from my mini-keyboard

2011-05-13T19:04:00.001-05:00

So I am crafting this from my phone, on a very difficult night, under stressful (though not critical) times. Hardships are abound because Miles is sick- fighting bronchitis. And Jesse and I are dealing with four and a half months on new parent exhaustion. While Penelope is doing beautifully with sleeping at night, it's still not enough to replenish our adult tanks. I'm so exhausted these days I've started seeing spots, literally. I also looked like I've aged another 10 years overnight. Guess that pregnancy glow wears off fast- you get stuck looking like a pasty, puffy zombie in desperate need of a salon visit. I've got more roots than a rainforest and my eyes are rivaling that black and grey critter that forages nightly in our trashcans. Ugh.

Enough of the moaning- I'm starting to feel worse just typing this out. Alright, some positive notes... Penelope is developing beautifully. She adores Miles; he is her sun and moon. Miles, in turn, has grown quite attached to the wee one. He constantly asks for her when they are apart. It's enough to melt your heart, even a sleep deprived and zombified heart. The love they have for each, though just beginning to blossom, keeps me going longer than the largest size of java Starbucks can muster. A venti sized serving of my kids awesomeness is what's fueling me tonight.

90 Seconds. . .

2011-04-26T05:08:00.002-05:00

. . . is what I have to quickly update this page!

-Penelope will be 4 months old tomorrow. OMG.

-Reflux is still here but under control.

-She's a chubby, bubbly, wubbly angel.

-Miles is doing great right now.

-Just had a tiny growth spurt. Up a shoe size and clothing size. Yep, he's rocking 2Ts now.

-His vocalizations are amazing. Stringing 2-3 words together consistently. My favorites: "thank you" and "help me" which he says unprompted.

-Last night he gave Penelope both trains and crayons. Way to go big brother. (She tried to eat them. I think teething is on the horizon.)

-School year is in the final stretch.

-Trip to Kennedy Krieger is looming in the not to distant future.

-We are open to summer idea suggestions. Miles has a few ESY sessions we'll have to work around, but other than that, we are wiiiiiiiiiiiiide open for fun and frolicking!

Time's up! Gotta run.

So where am I...

2011-04-18T20:34:00.002-05:00

... mainly on Instagram. If you want to see the latest and greatest of the kiddos, visit me there (annaweigel100/ Anna T) or on facebook. I will totally accept your friend request if you mention Milestones. : )

Am I boycotting blogging? No, not even close. It's just so much easier to get my networking fixes using my phone, and I am not yet feeling the urge to blog on my phone. Give it time- I'm basically living on it.

We're Home!

2011-04-08T21:12:00.002-05:00

A few days of sun and fun in OBX with Grandma and Grandpa Thomas... a fantastic way to spend Spring Break and the ever-looming (as in tomorrow) 31st birthday. Lesson learned: I am not feel older, but my skin is no longer 19. Case in point, it took only 30 minutes of late afternoon sun to transform me into an abstract art project. Why yes, that red trapezoid, the large one between my boobies, is naturally occurring. Not.

Pictures to come. Sleep comes first. Later gators.

: |

2011-04-04T19:00:00.002-05:00

Treatable but annoying... Impetigo. Our regular and much beloved doc was on vacation- and our second and third string options were out of the office, too. Call in the 3rd Runner up, Dr. Blunt-n-Chatty. I knew the diagnosis before the appointment, but I still had to sit through (again!!) the lecture entitled "Your Son's a Tad Different." Today's installment was entitled, "Lazy Leukocytes." No harm, no foul- but that's why this doc is our 4th option. Still, we heart this practice.

(Note the quasi-mood improvement above. Thanks emoticons for being so flexible with your expressive options. Above, you'll note I'm now feeling "Muah.")

: (

2011-04-03T20:51:00.002-05:00

A rocky start to Spring Break. Miles is headed into the doc's office tomorrow. Ugh! And this is not for a run of the mill common cold. Please, oh please, please, please please let me be both wrong and overly protective. Grrrrrrrrr... bacteria!

Where am I?

2011-03-30T20:51:00.002-05:00

Under the fog of sleeplessness, wading through the transition back to work. Luckily, I have been able to make my self super busy. In the past few days, I have completely reorganized my room, re-crafted a literature unit, and built a replica of Harlem circa 1945 in my classroom. Whatever it takes, right?

I miss Penelope so much, so much that it aches. Racing home and snatching her up for a little feeding/ bonding time is getting me through the day.

Loving the middle school schedule right now because I can get home by 3. Not too shabby.

Now it's time for a power nap. Got roughly 2 hours before she eats again. Rest while I can. Blah. Too tired to include subjects in my sentences... will settle for imperatives. Lights out.

(insert loud crashing sound of me falling to the floor)

My Current Favorite Resources- Link Overload!

2011-03-26T08:42:00.004-05:00

1. I've recently joined DownSyndrome.com. Looks like it will be a good hub for families and community members to meet and share info. If you are interesting in requesting membership, click here DownSyndrome.com

2. I love a good research site. This one is amazing! Down Syndrome Education Online maintains an academic integrity in their reporting and sharing, and I prefer to read clinical reports in their original format- too much is lost when others summarize. If you are a geek like me, then you'll like this site. Click here to see the most recent additions to their on-line publications.

3. My all-time favorite... ERIC online! You can search for anything education related- just make sure to set your search preferences to include "full journal" if you want to the article (as opposed to scoring it from an outside source). ERIC is great for looking into educational hot topics- behavioral research and applications where I spent most of last summer. Thanks to ERIC, I am a guru on token economies and why I will never use one again.

4. And of course... The National Down Syndrome Society. Got to love the NDSS. Click here to see Miles! (And you can vote for him... for what, I am not sure. But you can certainly "like" it for Fb.)

5. Last but not least, this is a link to a short but sweet article on Translocation. Miles has Translocation 21, 21. I might have mentioned this in the past, but our geneticist, Dr. Proud, wrote the article.

As you read it, you might wonder if either Jesse and I are carriers. As far as we know, neither of us are carriers- so we have an "unbalanced" situation. Shortly after Miles's diagnosis, we all had our karotypes completed. Some day I have frame them all and entitle it, "The World's Most Exact Family Portrait." Seriously, I've had this thought. I've also thought about outsourcing the project to this company. There is a website for every fancy.

Splish Splash... in a bubble wonder land!

2011-03-26T08:28:00.001-05:00

Tomorrow

2011-03-24T20:03:00.004-05:00

Tomorrow is my last official day of maternity leave. Wow- this just dawned on me. I know that the date has been slowly creeping up, but life has been to busy for me to dwell on it. And honest to God, I haven't felt sad until I typed that first sentence. Now, I am sitting here- head in hand- feeling awful.

Let me jump back a few years for a moment. Returning to work following my huge leave with Miles (all of spring and summer) was equivalent to learning how to re-breath oxygen independently. He and I were so close for those months, and we had shared to scariest and most stressful times together- not to leave out absolute blissful moments of wonderment and miracles. Caring for him had become such a natural extension of myself that leaving him every morning for school left me in tears during my daily commute for weeks. With time, the transition, as most typically do, got easier. And by the following year, leaving for work was a piece of cake (except for the fact that I leave before the sun is even awake).

Flip back to this moment, and I am right back in that difficult position. Self-created for sure, but none the less heartbreaking. Every cell in my body is attached to that darling baby girl; we don't go for very long without contact. I think to date the longest we've been apart was 7 hours- and nothing else comes even close to that. We both light up when we greet each other from nap breaks and play sessions. She literally purrs in my arms; I've never heard any other baby make this sound. We giggle, snuggle, tickle, and gaze for hours every day, and it's as if my arms were especially molded for her tiny body- that we were made for each other. For 9 months and then another 12 weeks, we've been inseparable. Literally.

In preparation for my return, I introduced Penelope to the bottle about three weeks ago. Since then my milk supply has been slowly dwindling. Even though she will still latch, I have to supplement all feeding with additional formula. I can no longer make enough milk for her. I'm wondering if even the thought of pumping at work has taken a psychological toll on the situation, but that's just speculation. This in itself has been very upsetting; I would prefer that she exclusively gets breast milk, but that is now beyond my control. Her health is what comes first and foremost, and homegirl likes to eat. From the moment she arrived, Penelope has been wonderful at feeding. She immediately latched following her delivery- just seconds after popping out she knew what to do. Truth be told, she near ate off my nipples in those early days, though thankfully, we were able to develop a fantastic feeding routine (and nipples of steel). This meant the world to me because breast feeding Miles was very difficult and stressful. Anyone who has ever struggled with breastfeeding can attest that feeling- it sucks, hands down, especially when this is a topic ripe for new mommy boastings. Penelope's enthusiasm and receptiveness not only boosted my confidence as a mom and gave me some redemption in my ego department. Furthermore, it only added to our bond. We went from Super Glue to electromagnetic status. Perhaps, dare I say, Super Strings attachment?

Anyways...

I am getting a little too upset to finish this post. I'd much rather spend this time watching her dream than reflecting on how sad I am about going back to work. Besides, we all do what we have to do for our families, right? Isn't that the role of a parent? In my case, I am the sole carrier of our health insurance policy- so there is no wiggle room- my buns are due back on Monday. I just hope both Miles and Penelope will someday know that every hour I spent working, taking classes, commuting, and completing professional development programs, I did for them. Though I am exceedingly proud of my profession and feel very, very, very blessed to have my job, I would instantly opt to stay home if it were feasible. Besides, as we all know, my passion for special education runs very deep; I will always be involved in the community in some fashion or another.

While my very being craves to stay at home with my children, I must spend some of that time away to ensure that we have a home to share together. Once again I am finding myself in awe of the power of parenthood- the pain of sacrifice and the love that keeps you going... even when your motivation is waiting for you in someone else's arms.

Creative Outlet

2011-03-22T21:18:00.004-05:00

Though I doubt I'll have time to pick up a paint brush in the near (say decade) future, at least I've snazzy cameras, cute kids, and interesting settings for self-portraits around the house. a

St. Patrick's Day Cuteness

2011-03-22T21:15:00.001-05:00

SUPER! Moonlight Drive

2011-03-22T21:13:00.001-05:00

Super Moon over the James River

Did you know...

2011-03-22T21:06:00.004-05:00

...that Monday was World Down Syndrome Day? March 21, 3/21, Trisomy 21.

Though we didn't do anything extraordinary to mark the occasion, we did live life as we always do. Naps, walk-in trip to Colonial Williamsburg, snacks from the Cheese Shop. Frankly, that seems to be the best way to celebrate- to include Miles in everything we do, to let his abilities (not his inabilities) be our inspiration, to love him as an individual, and to celebrate his daily achievements. Guess every day is World Down Syndrome Day in our house. Chances are that it is the same in yours, too.

Gotta love this kid!

Neck News

2011-03-17T20:54:00.003-05:00

All cleared! His neck film came back with fantastic results. This is a huge relief to us all. Now it's time to look into Dream Catchers Therapeutic Riding program. (Click on the colored link in the previous section to learn more.)

My Green Queen

2011-03-15T11:05:00.003-05:00

Gearing up for St. Patty's. Wait 'til you see what the kids will be wearing. I am getting giddy just thinking about it! Love a good holiday I do... so much so that it causes me to think in Yoda-Speak. Wait, he's green, too!

Updates All Around

2011-03-14T19:55:00.002-05:00

Update on the x-rays- for the most part, Miles did a great job. If brush his teeth is an ordeal, then it goes without saying that keeping him stabilized for a series of neck shots was a feat and a half. Jesse scored yet another gold star for being able to assist the team. So he's gone from OB (helping deliver Penelope) to on-call radiologist. Pretty soon I might have to start coughing up a co-pay when he brings me my morning cup of joe. I wouldn't mind so much; he's awesome.

We will know the results of the "photo shoot" within a few days.

Back to Japan... just minutes ago I learned the news that a third blast was heard at Fukushima and that the evacuation range has now been widened to twelve miles (185,000 people in total). After hearing the news I could no longer put off my donation, so over to the Red Cross I clicked. In a matter of seconds I was able to make a contribution. Click on the organization's name above for a direct link to the donation page if you are considering helping out. I am also looking for an organization that specifically helps young children- diapers, blankets, lovies... if you know of one, please let me know.

Now a quick word on Penelope- she started acid reflux medication over the weekend. I think I mentioned that the cardiologist could see the reflux in action during ladybug's echo. Well, so far we are thinking this medication is helping. She's eating more, and that is critically important because her weight gain had sharply declined over the past three weeks. Now, within three days, she's up half a pound. I don't want to be overly optimistic, but I am desperate for her to get back on the chubby track. She needs to reach 16 pounds by her fourth month, and as of now, that seems very far off. Clearly she takes after Jesse in this department because all I have to do is simply say the word "donut" and I get a new stretch mark. If she were my girl, all of that boobie juice would have gone straight to her tiny thighs. I kid... only to make myself less stressed.

Good night all- I hear the little one stirring.

Sticking his neck out, so to speak

2011-03-13T21:02:00.004-05:00

We will be headed to CHKD to have Miles's AAI x-ray completed. Don't know how they will get him to hold still. Getting a hair cut last week took me basically standing on my head, singing all of his favorite songs. And even that only allotted time for a two minute trim.

The x-ray is standard procedure for Ds health maintenance, but this doesn't mean I am not getting a little anxious. What- me worry about a medical procedure? As many different specialists we've seen and as many tests I've watched my sweet little boy endure, it never gets easy. And I am fearing tomorrow will be a doozie. Please send us good vibes so that we sail through the session, and more importantly, his film comes out looking trouble-free.

What to say, what to say

2011-03-12T20:46:00.002-06:00

Tomorrow is the annual CDR Auction, and we (meaning me) are going to give a little talk during the main auction. I've spent the last few days racking my brain, trying to come up with a good stater or lead-in. In the fall, when I spoke at an event, I completely threw out my notes the moment I hit the podium. Chances are I would do the same thing, so I am inclined to go with the moment and speak from the heart. Regardless, I still need an intro...

However, my brain, eyes, and ears have been hijacked by all of the coverage from Japan- specifically events related to the Fukushima plants. I am checking on international sources, which are proving to be drastically different from US reports, hourly. And my fingers are also flipping the iPod to Twitter updates. The status of those reactors has my undivided attention.

For as long as I can remember, I have been deeply captivated by nuclear energy- from a very young age. I remember seeing blast footage- a clip of a clapboard barn being destroyed in our early atomic experiments, and that imagery is seared in my memory. If I had to guess, the raw power of the footage has haunted me ever since. Then came Chernobyl and the countless National G editions dedicated to it and our reliance on nuclear power. Once again, it was the photos from National G- images from the abandoned Ukrainian village- turned over tables, lonely toys, closed curtains... yet again, pictures haunting me from the past. (Don't even get me started on the Silkwood movie, which I own.) Today, as the events have unfolded, I can't help but see the parallels. I can't even begin to understand the fear that is coursing through the Japanese people.

So I may not know what I am going to say tomorrow, I do know what I going to say tonight. A prayer. A prayer for Japan and its people, for those already lost to the natural disasters, those looking for help, those looking for loved ones, and those aiding in the search and rescue effort. A prayer for those who are working at Fukushima, those already impacted by its damage, and those who are reporting its status from the front line. And a prayer for us all to remain hopeful in light of all of these mounting tragedies.

"In all things it is better to hope than to despair."

-Goethe

My lovely little lady... sigh.

2011-03-10T10:12:00.000-06:00

A Two Tiger Kind of Night

2011-03-09T20:35:00.003-06:00

Miles is having a two-tiger kind of night- meaning he needed to snuggle with an extra tiger during bedtime. This brings the stuffed animal count up to five: two tigers, a beaver, a frog, and a Big Toe. He needed an extra light on, which we've never done before. And here's the kicker- he wanted to hold my hand. Rarely does he seek out affection of this nature. Typically, I am lucky to get in a quick cheek peck in daily, but loving of this nature (especially initiated by the little tough guy he has become) is quite unique. I think he was super tired tonight, so relaxing has been a bit harder for him. Earlier today he had his blood drawn for the annual thyroid screening. Though he handled the test like a true big boy, Jesse said kiddo did get a bit freaked out near the end of the test. Can you blame him? I have a huge fear of needles, so he comes by this honestly. So this, plus a day packed full of play, may have pushed him over the edge. But he's asleep now- thank goodness.

I too will need two tigers tonight because I am worried about Penelope. Tomorrow I plan on calling our ped. to discuss acid reflux concerns. Ever since the heart screening on Tuesday, Jesse and I are much more aware of this problem; having the cardiologist see reflux evidence during her assessment wasn't lost on our ears. I also want to discuss her slowing in weight gain. She's been hovering in the same range now for over two weeks; I am guessing this is reflux related. While she's eating roughly every three hours, which is right on tracking, the weight just isn't adding up.

Two tigers are also needed because I am wrestling with some serious ghosts of Two Month Appointments Past. (Read this entry as a refresher.) Maybe I am feeling more scared than I care to acknowledge. Maybe I am waiting for the other proverbial shoe to drop. This is exactly when we were met with Miles's Ds diagnosis. Now, as I type this entry, I am holding my breath in fear... waiting to learn of some difficulty, some setback, some new hurdle that my dear Penelope will have to face. I hate being pessimistic, but there are certain life experiences that leave such deep scars that knee jerk reactions and unavoidable triggers are just part of the turf.

Okay, I will "man up" and admit that I do this type of thinking as a self-defense mechanism. Allow me to elaborate- if I think of a possible event (more likely to be a bad experience), then I will be able to think of solutions before the event occurs- but in actuality, this strategy has NEVER worked for me. In my own feeble way, I am trying to protect myself from all of the scary what-if's that lurk in Parent Land. Sidebar- to my parents and your contemporaries, my hat's off to you. Being a parent is by far and beyond the most challenging, soul searching, and albeit, rewarding adventure of my life. In fact, it gives my life a whole new meaning. And the power of the experience is why, at least for me, it can hurt so much, too.

As a parent, I want the best for my children- health and happiness. When one of these goals are in jeopardy, I can't help but kick into super mom mode and look for remedies and solutions. When there isn't an easy fix, like a boo-boo kiss or bedtime handholding session, my heart hurts. Really, really hurts. And my mind begins to wander to that area of the What-Ifs. My main what-if is a variation on the same theme- what if I can't help them?!? Ugh!

To be honest, I already feel 90% better just writing it out. And reader, I hope that I have not put any of my stress onto you. Here, I have written to celebrate, to mourn, to vent, and to heal. This blog is the hub for my emotional cross-hares and puddlings, sappy sobs and fierce hollers. Tonight, I think I just oozed out a pile of painful confusions. Thanks for letting me do that. Now that some of the weight has been lessened, I need to secure two tigers of my own.

(And I will update of Penelope's reflux issues as soon as I learn more. Please wish my ladybug a good night's sleep. It's becoming more obvious that this is not a good time of day for her.)

And the beat goes on!

2011-03-08T19:10:00.003-06:00

Quickly- all hearts look great!

YEAH!!!

Miles's patched VSD looks fully healed over- with great tissue growth on top. The stenosis, though still present, has reduced since his last visit, and the doc is convinced it will continue to reduce on its own. Fun fact, there was a repair done to an ASD flap, a tiny stitch or two done during the surgery, that I didn't know about. Apparently it's something they do commonly, as if you just happen to be in the neighborhood... well, that, too, is looking great.

Penelope's ticker and all related parts look fantastic. Doc did detect signs of reflux during the exam- something we need to keep an eye on. Can't say that I am surprised, but I thought this was something that was getting better. Another "hmmmm" moment popped up when the doc plotted Penelope on her growth chart. Yesterday, during her 2 month check-up, Penelope landed in the 40th percentile for weight and height. Today, she measured in the 25th. Hmmm... heart doc said she might wind up in the 5' 2'' to 5' 3'' range. Note- I am ingesting a huge grain of salt right now (and just because I am eating leftover fried rice as I type). I'm forcing myself not to stress over these measurements because there was such a huge variance from one day to the next. Ugh! Measurements are always random with our kids because no one uses the same devices- so this will help ease that worried wrinkle on my forehead, just a tad.

But anyhoo, big news, the hearts are great.

A Label I Like! (Milestones)

2011-03-08T07:47:00.003-06:00

Wouldn't it been fun to get paid for taking pictures of your own children? I've got to find a way to make it happen- especially since my maternity leave is nearing an end. And seriously, my kids are stunners!

Less Anxious than I Thought I'd be... (so far)

2011-03-08T07:38:00.002-06:00

Miles and Penelope are headed in to see the cardiologist this morning. Jesse and I are big fans of this doc- she's super sharp and very professional. She caught one of Miles' more difficult to see defects- one that even UVA's team disputed until proven during the actual surgery.

Anyways, the doc visits our town once a month (saving us a painful drive to her office)- so we're hopping in today. Miles is having his third post-op follow-up. Penelope is having an initial screening. As of now, I am feeling cool as a cuke, but I am sure once their respective echo's pop up I will tense up. While we've not had any specific cardio concerns for little man- he's growing and has boundless energy- there is a little lingering fear from the summer of '08. Can you blame me? And no murmur has been detected during Penelope's check-ups- though there was never a murmur heard with Miles... granted, Penelope has not been diagnosed with Ds- but her ped. and I both think this is one area we can't "wait and see" in.

I will swing back by later today and post an appointment update. Please keep us in your thoughts today.

Small People (and pug) & Big Fun: Miles Turns 3

2011-03-07T09:03:00.006-06:00

Update from the Cute Front: Month 2 of Adorableness

2011-03-07T08:56:00.003-06:00

Three years of awesomeness crammed into a single photo!

2011-03-06T19:03:00.003-06:00

Happy Birthday beautiful boy! You are my sunshine, obviously.

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You'll never know dear
How much I love you
Please don't take my sunshine away

Since his birthday isn't officially until tomorrow, I will wait to sing that song. Tonight, however, the above will work just fine.

Best First Ever Milestone!

2011-02-28T15:05:00.003-06:00

Last night Miles strung together the most beautiful three word sentence I've ever heard. Three words in itself is a milestone. Up until now we've consistently gotten two word requests and descriptors from Miles, but never an actual sentence- something with a clear subject and predicate. Now brace yourself because his first sentence will knock your socks off...

I love you.

My heart is still in a pudding state. We got numerous repeats this morning, and Daddy and Grandpa got their I love you's after breakfast- and I am sure he's ready to share it some more. But now matter how many times I hear it over the years, nothing will compare to the sweetness, the excitement, and absolute bliss I felt last night. I was floored, not expecting him to say it back- but he did, and it sounded perfect! Hearing that from your child is such a special occasion. Waiting nearly three years to experience it makes the event all the more special. I am counting this as an early birthday and Mother's Day present rolled into one! Miles, I love you, too!

An Amazing Cause... come join us!

2011-02-24T14:15:00.003-06:00

Click here to learn more!

And if you stay for the Live Auction portion, you'll get a chance to hear us speak about CDR. This will be the second time we've spoken on behalf of the organization, and we are honored to be asked back. We owe a great debt to CDR; they are a phenomenal early intervention program that serves the Williamsburg/ James City County/ York County area. This will be our first time attending the auction, and from what I hear, there will be plenty of fun activities (including animals and Sesame Street characters) to keep the kiddos entertained. We'd love to share the day with you. (Hopewellians, the location is a quick jump off of Route 5 and closer than going to the outlet mall.) Hope to see you all there!

Sleeping Beauty, the Penelope Edition

2011-02-23T20:25:00.002-06:00

Tigers make good pillows.

2011-02-23T20:22:00.002-06:00

Tea Time! (With Plastic Chicken)

2011-02-23T20:18:00.002-06:00

My busy, busy bee

2011-02-23T20:15:00.000-06:00

Total Boy...

2011-02-18T09:40:00.005-06:00

... who apparently is fantastic at playing tea party in school- he takes the time pour of all in attendance, but you wouldn't know if from the picture above. At home, it's trucks and trains all of the time. He even tells the trains goodnight during our bedtime routine. Too cute.

Spring: The Season of Co-Pays

2011-02-18T09:01:00.004-06:00

We are in the process is setting up an appointment with the Kennedy Krieger Institute. I sent back to biggest pre-appointment-packet-ever this morning. If you know me, then you know I love a good forming filling out session. But seriously, it took me three sitting last night to complete all of the questions. Note, I am not whining; in fact, I love it. If we are going to commit to spending a few days and quite a few dollars on this venture, I want the biggest bang for my buck. I am not a fan of getting back half-assed medical summaries, chock full of the information (a) I already know and/or (b) I reported in the first place.

This is why I feel making this journey will be valuable. Not only will we have an opportunity to have some new assessments done (we're thinking a neurological exam is about due), we will get our first non-system (early childhood intervention program) testing done. I am eager to see how the results stack up to one another. However, it won't be a true comparison since Miles' hasn't had a full eval in about a year.

Also, I want to know how his medical progress is coming along, specifically from a clinic that specializes solely in Ds. While I love our local pediatricians, I want feedback from a practice whose stock and trade is trisomy 21. If you recall, we had a less than fulfilling visit with our quasi-local developmental doc. In fact, it was a big waste of time. (And we never got a summary report; don't think I have forgotten that nugget.) Anywhoo... I am really hoping that we get some good input on kiddo and his progress.

In other medical news: March is when the kids see our cardiologist for a follow-up (Miles) and initial screening (Penelope). We are also going to have his AAI x-ray completed, along with his annual thyroid screening. For the past two years, his thyroid test has come back with good results- not great, seeing that the levels are elevated enough to warrant observation, but good enough not to need treatment.

Back to Kennedy Krieger for a sec- I think it would be quite fun to schedule in a little fun time while in Baltimore, for nostalgia's sake. When I was a heck of a lot younger, my fam made a fun trip to the inner harbor area, and I know Miles will get the biggest kick out of the aquarium and all of the huge ships. Hopefully, not too much has changed. This could be a silver lining to the whole experience (and a fun way to celebrate turning 31, ugh!).

In the quiet of the afternoon...

2011-02-14T20:02:00.001-06:00

...some mother-daughter bonding time.

Kennedy Krieger, anyone?

2011-02-11T21:10:00.003-06:00

We are thinking about taking Miles there for an evaluation. Has anyone out there visited the Institute? What did you think? It would a pretty big trip for us, but I don't think we have anything like this available regionally. (Yes, we've been to the developmental ped w/ CHKD and were thoroughly unimpressed with their slapdash assessment style and zero follow-up, so it's time to move on to bigger and better research facilities.)

I am also open to ABA recommendations in the Hampton Roads/ Greater Richmond area. Hit me back if you've got any good leads. Thanks!

Goodbye Rajah

2011-02-07T18:20:00.004-06:00

My dearest friend and beloved dog Rajah passed away Friday night. He had been my constant companion for the past nine years- from helping me cram for final exams to welcoming home both Miles and Penelope. We weathered heartbreak and celebrations, hugs and tears, and many an amazing romp in the sand and snow. One never to pass up ear rubs and belly scratches, Rajah was the eternal snuggler and seeker of affection.

His passing was unexpected and happened very quickly- so much so that I didn't have a chance to say goodbye. I was able to spend some time with him after he passed away, and even during those precious and painful moments, he continued to keep my toes warm and my heart full. I will forever remember looking at my hand after the last belly rub and noting the fur that was laced between my fingers. After looking at it for just a few seconds, a quick breeze blew it all away. And that's how I still feel... that he his time was both substantial and brief, that a lot of life was crammed into a handful of years, that he came and went before my eyes.

We've all been sad, very sad. Miles was very fond of Rajah; they were partners is crime. Though little man may not fully comprehend the situation, he has taken to saying goodbye to Rajah while going through our bedtime routine- and it is breaking my heart. Luckily, Miles and Liloo are also good pals, so he still has a furry companion on hand. And speaking of Liloo, Rajah was her everything. Watching her adjust to his departure is even harder. She spent Friday night at our door, waiting for him to enter. Sadly, he never did. Luckily, she's eating and interacting with us, so I think she will come around sooner than later. However, we consulted with the vet today to make sure she's on the right track. (She's taken to some stress-related behaviors that we're hoping to curb on our own.)

If you were luckily enough to have known Rajah, then you can attest to his boundless energy and love of all people. Crazy dog never passed up a party or a chance to meet someone new. And you also know that he never considered himself a dog- that might be due to him going to class with me. (He also liked wearing my sorority t-shirts, oddly enough.) Having completed two semesters at W&M may have gone to his head.

I wish I had to words to truly express my sorrow. I wish I had had a chance to say "I love you" one more time. I wish I had had a chance to say thanks- thank you for the unconditional love and companionship. I hope Rajah left us knowing how much we all love him. Goodbye dear friend; hope you are getting the celestial belly scratches you so greatly deserve.

Welcome to Smilesville

2011-02-01T10:08:00.001-06:00

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful girl.

A World Record

2011-02-01T10:00:00.002-06:00

Miles sprouted a new tooth yesterday, and its buddy is not far behind. During the a.m. brushing routine, Jesse spotted the new tooth. He also saw the site of the next eruption. I am not 100% certain of the make and model, but I think its a canine that's moved into kiddo's mouth. We knew a new tooth was on its way in- seeing that Miles had recently begun drooling more than our dogs during dinner time. This also explains why his appetite has been so unpredictable lately. Aaaaaaand his general crankiness. Perhaps my mom will share the story of my fussiness when my wisdom teeth popped up during our trip to the West Coast. (Spoiler Alert: I ended the leg of our trip in a painkiller haze- during which I said something very snappy to Neil Young while boarding a flight. And I love Neil Young, but I not impressed with the sluggishness of his seat taking pace.)

As for the world record- Miles has now been teething for two and a half years. Please get this kid (and his parents) a merit badge because this is redonkulous. Ridiculous was when we hit the two year mark...

You really otter visit the VLM...

2011-01-31T19:06:00.001-06:00

... like we did yesterday!

Hanging with our buddies at the Virginia Living Museum

2011-01-31T18:52:00.004-06:00

Yesterday was sunny and not bitterly cold, so headed over the VLM with some of our favorite folks to visit some of our favorite animals. Best picture of the day goes to the wolves though...

Lanaux and P. Lanaux

2011-01-31T18:33:00.004-06:00

The meeting of the name sake- a very special moment for us all.

I am toying with names like Lanaux 2.0, Lanaux Now: Redux, and Lanaux: Beyond the Thunderdome. With a namesake like this lady, you better have a big-bang nickname on hand. Something cinematic and chromatic. And it's gotta have chutzpah! The phone lines are now open.

Thanks for the visit!

Well...

2011-01-29T18:39:00.000-06:00

...last night equally long, if not longer. However, the crying was never zero volume. I will take active over fussy any day. Hands down.

Gripe, gripe, gripe

2011-01-27T21:05:00.002-06:00

Yes, we have resorted to Gripe Water. Nights are getting longer and more stressful. I am desperately hoping this homeopathic route will give the little ladybug some relief. If not, we are on to an elimination diet (for me) and a trip to the doctor (for her). Last night, during a brief but intense crying jag, I relayed to youngster that sleep deprivation helps no one. I could swear I saw her roll her eyes ever so briefly.

Have I mentioned how tired I am these days? So very tired. In fact, I've napped the past two days without choice- meaning that my brain officially shuts off around 3 pm. Thankfully, those 45 minutes of power snoozing are making the early evenings more tolerable. However, one look at my face reveals the fact that I the far from rested. Caught my reflect earlier, would have sworn there was an errant geographical feature resting under my eyes. Sadly, those are just my bags steadily creeping toward my mouth. Perhaps they are headed in that region in an attempts to engage Penelope in some negotiations. Good luck with that.

My tank is near empty. Praise Jesus for maternity leave... because this is the only thing I can handle right now. Motherhood is more than a lifestyle; it's a livesstyle.

Penelope: One Month

2011-01-27T21:03:00.003-06:00

Hey Munchkin- Your mommy loves you!

Taking a Grandpa Nap

2011-01-27T21:02:00.002-06:00

Looking Like a Weigel...

2011-01-25T19:40:00.003-06:00

... at least we think so.

Kisses

2011-01-25T19:39:00.002-06:00

More of the Music Man

2011-01-25T19:36:00.002-06:00

Enough of the paparazzi!

A Naturally Occurring Faux-Hawk

2011-01-19T19:46:00.001-06:00

She already looks like a miniature Top Chef competitor.

Too cute.

How many kids do you know that already have a bestie by age three weeks???

2011-01-19T19:27:00.004-06:00

In 18 years I fully expect to be having the "No, you cannot go to Beach Week" conversation with these two ladies. Penelope is on the left, and Phoebe is on the right. And I've already caught Penelope trying to text Phoebe while she thought I was sleeping. Luckily, she has yet to learn how her hands work, and even the fact that those hands are hers, so she was unable to complete her message.

I'm guessing that we are going to have a Jesse & Andy re-make, only with more pink and dolls and less firecrackers and skateboards. I could be wrong about the skateboards. And the firecrackers, too. Here's hoping I am not.

FAQ: the Penelope Edition

2011-01-19T18:56:00.004-06:00

True to form, I have many questions constantly swirling around in my brain- like a whirlpool of quasi-facts and speculations looking to scarf down one Katherine Hepburn. So the FAQ's are for me... this is what is on the front burner.

During our two week infant check-up (last Monday), I asked out pediatrician if she saw any signs of Down syndrome in Penelope. Not that I suspect her of having Ds, it's just that we are entering some temporally familiar territory, and I wanted to give the doc a chance to share any concerns sooner than later. I even premised my questions with a smart smile, a quip about not wanting any later surprises, etc., etc., all the while holding my breath. I shared with her that we didn't see anything of concern, yet. I did note that Penelope has a unilateral (one hand) palmar crease- but that was the only marker I could detect. After a close examination, doc said we have nothing to worry about. Regardless, I asked if we should go ahead and have a karyotype done- to this the doc also said no- everything looks fine. For the most part, I have let it go, but with her two month check-up looming in the near future, I can't help but fight off some lead-hearted flashbacks. Those three year old memories still sting my heart, as do the tears that occasionally sneak up when I re-read his diagnosis post.

Good initial reports aside... we are going to have Penelope seen by the cardiologist during Miles' upcoming annual check-up. Since his heart defect was so difficult to detect, we all agreed (doc included) that this screening would be a good idea. On a side note, Miles' appointment is starting to weigh on my mind, too. This could be the time when we learn that he's headed into the cath lab for some follow-up work. There is a chance that the webbing has returned, and that a cath will be needed to correct the stenosis. Granted, this was only speculation at his last appointment- so I am only worrying about the unknown at this juncture. I will update when I know more. Additionally, I will try not to worry about this event (and other stressful nuggets) which is out of my control. (If I had a dollar for each time I've stated this...)

Deep breath. Moving on.

Okay, now it's time for my less serious and relatively inappropriate questions:

1. Why does her poop smell like movie theater popcorn? Seriously, it does- and not in a good way. Chances are that I will never order it again. Stronger chances of me not making it to a movie in the next 5 years. The correlating color of said poop doesn't help the comparison.

2. Does my left boob taste better than my right boob? She certainly seems to act that way. Perhaps the left boob has movie theater buttery goodness hiding inside. That would explain number one.

3. What's up with all of the giggling during sleep? Okay- it is the cutest thing EVER, but I want to see her giggle while she's awake. I want to know what is so funny because I could really go for a good laugh right about now.

4. Does she accept bribes? At this point, I am willing to buy her a pony if she's willing to sleep more at night and less during the day. A pony. With ribbons and sparkles and glitter and a princessy name to boot.

5. How can I make bath a more enjoyable experience? She treats bathing like an excursion into water-boarding territory. I use my most soothing vocal tones, warm waters, and California Baby products (which even mellow me out just being in their proximity). Bathing, especially with bubbles and stack of tabloids, is a girl's best friend. Maybe we need a subscription to OK! and Look!.

I'm off to run a bath using the under-appreciated California Baby Soothing Wash and collect a stack of magazines. What I am lacking in tabloids I will be replacing with Ready Made and Better Homes & Gardens. Though the impact may not be the same, I am sure my tired body will appreciate the effort. Sigh.

Sleepy Time

2011-01-18T14:33:00.000-06:00

New Camera= Experimental Video

2011-01-18T14:27:00.002-06:00

This is just a test... a very cute test.

Me & Julio (Dada and DiDi) Down by the School Yard

2011-01-18T13:11:00.004-06:00

Parallel Play?

2011-01-12T10:25:00.003-06:00

These were taken after he loaded her chair with the animals (see below). I am counting this as parallel play, or perpendicular play. Close and peaceful proximity counts, right? Ahhh... siblings! She just needs to learn to love trains- according to Miles.

Sleeping Beauty

2011-01-12T10:22:00.002-06:00

Maintaining such high levels of cuteness is exhausting, apparently.

Slumbering

2011-01-08T18:47:00.003-06:00

It's nearing 8 pm, and the wee one has been asleep most of the day. We're talking a solid 98% of our waking hours she's been zonked, carving zzzzzzz's out of stone. Now I am getting anxious- when will the daily wake fest happen??? Seeing that I, yet again, blew off any chance of a mommy nap- this could easily turn into a long night. Wish me (and all those in ear range) luck. Little one's lungs seem to be amplified in the later hours.

In other sleep related news, Miles has now officially adopted de-robing as his new nap-time ritual. On three separate occasions, I had to go into his room and help him back into his diaper and pants. Three times. And once he was finally out- he was back down to only his t-shirt. As long as the diaper is empty, this is pretty fun.

Navel Gazing and Whatnots

2011-01-07T09:52:00.007-06:00

Admittedly, bringing home a second child is infinitely less daunting and stressful than the first round. Experience shows that babies are more resilient than they appear on first glance and hold. In fact, you learn quite quickly that they are mini-spitfires, chock full of loud sounds and potent powers. For example, my delicate flower of a daughter turns into a milk fiend, a roving and rooting lactose leech. And if the supply isn't ready, she turns into a banshee. And I mean that with all the love in my heart.

I have yet to call the 24 hour nurse line (a HUGE deal). I've only taken her temperature once. And I've only referenced the "What to Expect in First Month" chapter ten times (give or take another ten). Though I am concerned about her navel... the cord popped out on my finger two nights ago while changing her diaper. After my initial yetching reaction and squeal, I assessed the situation. Everything looks okay, but there was a little blood. And a little more dried blood this morning. I am trying to keep my cool and refrain from personally diagnosing her as having an umbilical hernia.

Penelope's still a mystery. Her schedule is not a schedule, and my attempt to make one keeps getting flung back in my face. For example, there is absolutely nothing soothing about the bathing process... yet. The moment her little tushy hits the bathing pad, she gives me an expression that reads, "What have you done??? I thought we were friends!"

(2010)

Miles took a while to warm-up to the notion of bathing. Let's take a quick peek in the past... Here's hoping Penelope become a water-baby like her big brother. Granted, he's a bit older in the picture below, but I am planning on sharing this with her as a form of positive visualization- Be one with the bath. Let it soothe you (so I can get some sleep).

(2008)

Gentlemen, Start Your Engines

2011-01-05T09:07:00.006-06:00

I am literally coasting on fumes at this point. My little ladybug pulled another all-nighter and forming sentences that don't include milk, sleep, diapers, and angry nipples seems like a literary stretch. However, I want to make sure that I write Penelope's birth story before all those brain cells are lost to lack of sleep and a steady diet of granola bars and ice chips.

Unlike Miles' lightning labor and delivery process, Penelope's arrival spans several weeks. Looking over some of my earlier posts, it seems like "early labor" lasted forever. Prior to her birth date, I had been dilated 3 centimeters for well over a week. Even better, I was able to complete 98% of the "active labor" at home- but not intentionally. Here's the breakdown of the events.

First Came the Snow

December 26:

As we began to unwind from the present-fueled frenzy Miles underwent the day before, we watched the ground steadily collect a solid ten inches of snow. At the same time, a serious case of cabin fever kicked in. To help alleviate my stress, Jesse and I went on a drive while Miles played with his grandparents. While out and about in the white-out, I started to panic that I would be returning to work at the end of Winter Break, still pregnant and in pain. Luckily, I started having some mild contractions in the late afternoon- oddly enough at the downtown Green Leafe while picking up take-out for the fam. (Thank God I didn't have her there, though I bet I could have scored a new mug on the house.) At the time, I chalked them up to Braxton-Hicks, but it cracks me up to think I sat on a bar stool, counted out contractions while thinking back on how the times have changed.

The remainder of the evening progressed as usual, aside from the ever-mounting snow, aches, and pains. Dinner and bath routines went down as normal. There is a hilarious video of Miles and me floating around from this night- I was laid out on his bedroom floor (having back labor) while he uses me a human slide. Miles started on my shoulders and wiggled his way down my back- yelling sliiiiiii- during each trip down. And Jesse's role in the matter... to laugh and take footage on his phone.

We went to sleep around midnight, and there was no inkling in my mind that a baby would arrive in the near future. Seriously. I had been feeling this way for over a week, so why start to worry now? However...

December 27:

2:00 am: I wake up from a dream in which I am having contractions. Upon waking, I realize that these are real, I-have-to-breathe, contractions. Even they count as the real deal, they are not lasting 90 seconds. At best, they last 60 seconds and are coming anywhere between 3 to 5 minutes apart.

2:00- 3:00 am: To follow the doctor's orders, I make sure the contractions are present for at least an hour before calling the answering service. Wide awake and breathing like an asthmatic dragon, I have to find a way of silently passing this time. What's a girl to do? Obviously, I do my hair. Wiping out a digital timer and a curling iron, I sway, rock, and pant my way through a solid hour of hair curling. Folks have asked how my hair looked so good following Penelope's delivery- there's the answer. I swear to you that making barrel curls is the best way to dilate another 5 centimeters. Forget Lamaz; the future lies in the Pageant Hair Method. Go big, bold, spray it down, and then race to the hospital.

3:05 am: Barring the gory details, as soon as my hair is done- I go into transition. Ten minutes of solid purging, and I know that there's no turning back.

3:15 am: I reach the on-call doctor and get the green light to head into the hospital. Time to shock Jesse out of slumber and off to warm-up the car. He has no idea what's going on, but he's very adept at following directions whilst asleep.

3:45 am: Car finally cleaned off, grandparents are here to relieve us, and we begin our cautious trek (fabulous hair and all) to the hospital. The city roads are putting the ice capades to shame, but the interstate is clean. We arrive in about 20 minutes. Interestingly enough, I find Jesse's car a perfect spot to have intense labor- lots of handles to grab and surfaces to kick. Note: my water hasn't broken yet, so the upholstery is safe.

4:15 am: Hello ER! Following a triage check-in, where I threw my insurance card and license at the attendant and told her to read it herself. I tired to give a polite smile, but she may have missed it as I prowled around the waiting room. We head up to the delivery floor, but I refuse the wheelchair. Why wheel when I can walk this baby out, right? I only had to stop twice for air...

4:28 am: We breeze through the delivery triage and find that I am 7.5 centimeters at this point. I tell the nurse if they send me home I am planning on throwing myself down the stairs to ensure I can at least stay in the ER. Jesse knows I am joking, but she genuinely looks freaked out. I promptly get a private room across the hall. Note: the doctor has yet to show up, and I called an hour ago.)

4:35 am: Got the room. Lights are switched on. Playlist "Labor 2" has been turned on (it's all Motown), and a gaggle of anxious nurses are watching me kick into survival mode. I know that delivery time has arrived because I start shaking all over. "Ain't Too Proud to Beg" was playing at this point...

4:36 am: I calmly say, "You may not believe this, but I need to push." Fun legal note- nurses are not allowed to tell you to push, and they will tell you this when you shout "I have to push RIGHT NOW!" However, they can catch whatever little one may emerge. Note: Still no doctor.

I make it onto the bed and promptly remove the blood pressure cuff and pulse reader- in no way can I push with these items on. Thankfully, no one tries to reattach them. Furthermore, there was no time for an IV because removing that sucker myself would have hurt like the dickens. You should have seen me trying to pull my hair into a ponytail at this point...

4:40- 4:55 am: Rough 15 minutes of pushing. I have Jesse and the nurses adjust the bed, get the birthing bar, and bring me an oxygen mask. At one point, a nurse lowers a handle bar on which my leg had been resting. She does this as I am pushing through a contraction. Amazingly, I am able to bark out, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?" Magically, the handle bar returns in nanoseconds. Devine intervention keeps me from swearing, and the attending nurses are very helpful with counting (and unintentionally reminding me that the doctor still hasn't arrived). Jesse, my brave partner on my right, keeps me focused and updated on Penelope's progress. Right after my water breaks (better late than never), the little lady shoots out. Rene, my triage nurse, is there to catch her. Thank you, Rene!

4:55 am: Penelope Lanaux Thomas arrives weighing 7 pounds and 15 ounces. I would like to mention that there is a huge difference between naturally delivering a baby that weighs 5 pounds and one the weighs nearly 3 pounds more. Never let me wax poetic on the "magicalness" of the experience- this hurt like hell- but when you are done, you're done! Woo-hoo!

She arrived 7 tracks later, appropriately enough to The Supremes.

5:10 am: You'll never guess what happens now... the doctor arrives! I mumble something about not paying the practice, but Jesse quickly shoots me a "zip it" look. I clam up and continue to bask in my glory of my little one and limitless sea of euphoric endorphins. The doc decides to help me deliver the placenta, but I rob her of that job too and push it out while she's getting her gown tied on. Doctors? Where we're going we don't need doctors!

In a later post, I may want to vent about my concerns regarding the whole delivery situation. What if there had been a serious snag- what if Penelope's vitals started to drop? There was no one there who could have intervened... and we are baffled that an ER doc wasn't called up. Regardless, the attending nurses and my hubs were all very helpful and catered to my requests (demands). In retrospect, we are perfectly fine not having the doctor there- but we also know that we lucky in many, many, many ways- that we made it to the hospital on time, that the grandparents were on hand, and that there were no complications in Penelope's speedy arrival.

Now my little blizzard baby is over a week old- looking pink, plump, and pleased. She's a gift, a bundle of love and cuddles, and the perfect baby sister. Welcome home, ladybug. We've been waiting on you!

Hello World!

2011-01-03T17:34:00.004-06:00

Penelope Lanaux arrived December 27, 2010 at 4:55 am. She rode in on the tail end of a snow storm, and we rode ice sheets in our rapid trek to the hospital. While this doesn't count as the official birth story (which I am hoping to pen later tonight), I couldn't wait to share some of the images from the first leg of our adventure.

Much, much, much more to come. Including a delivery story that does not include a doctor, and perhaps, a new land speed record for pushing.

Uncle Clark & Daddy rocking the pink shirts in little lady's honor.

6 hours after arrival and we are all still awake... with excitement.

Penelope meets Dude.

Daddy-Baby snuggle time has begun.

Our icy view. Note: no plowing, only sand. We skated in hours before.

Her first picture- Penelope is a stunner!

Taken on the ride in- during mid-contraction. That's true dedication to documentation. There was no asphalt, only solid ice and snow. 10 inches to be exact.

Incoming?

2010-12-24T09:59:00.001-06:00

All the grandparents and our favorite Uncle Dude will be converging onto our abode tomorrow- seeing that I am under restricted travel, this is very thoughtful. Wouldn't it be nice if Penelope arrived to join in on all the holiday festivities? I certainly think so.

Bonding Time- Uncle Dude Style

2010-12-20T04:20:00.002-06:00

Sneak Peek: Happy Holidays!

2010-12-18T20:29:00.003-06:00

I just can't keep a secret! : )

Frequent Flier MIles- Early Labor Update

2010-12-17T08:41:00.004-06:00

So... at lot has been going on in the Penelope-Arrival department. On Wednesday, I thought labor had started during my Pre-Algebra block. Fearing my water might wash out a riveting unit on sale tax and its many exciting applications, I booked it over to the OB's office. Found out that I had dilated a centimeter. Not such a big deal for most folks, but in my case it instantly reminded me of Miles' delivery. When I was admitted with him, I had only dilated a centimeter as well. Regardless, contractions continued off and on until my regularly scheduled OB appointment Thursday.

I learned at this visit that my cervix is now at three centimeters. Hello Dolly! Now we are cooking with gas, right? So I thought. In fact, after an hour of solid contractions last night, Jesse and I made our (first) run to the maternity ward- but it was just a test run. My contractions were only 5 minutes apart, and my cervix was still at 3 centimeters. I thought for sure that these were the real deal because they hurt, like enough to keep my trap shut for a solid 40 seconds. Anyways, we clearly still have a long haul to go, so we opted to return home. I am glad we did because I was able to get some decent sleep.

Let's recap: In the past two days, I have had three pelvic exams. If I get another one in the next 24 hours, I am going to leave a guest book down there. At least we now know that Early Labor (according to the books) has basically reached its limit- now we just wait, patiently and calmly, for active labor to sneak up and smack me on the back. Could be today, tomorrow, or two weeks from now. Oh, joy. Regardless- Penelope looked great on the monitor last night, very active and happy- and that is what matters most.